Reach Out to Those Casual Friends You Miss

Reach Out to Those Casual Friends You Miss

On an average day, we interact between 11 and 16 times with casual acquaintances — think your favorite barista or the colleague that you always see at the microwave in the break room. Now that we live in an era of social distancing, these once-common interactions have disappeared, and we no longer have physical reminders that we are part of a wider social network. Reaching out to show someone that you’re thinking of them will make you both feel a bit closer during this challenging time. First, think of the right way to reach out — is it a text, a phone call, an email, a Facebook message? What will put the least amount of pressure on the recipient? If you don’t get a response, don’t take it personally. Think about this interaction as similar to smiling at a colleague in the hallway: Sometimes you might stop and chat, and sometimes you might not. Instead of expecting a reply, enjoy the knowledge that your message is likely to deliver a little hit of happiness for the recipient. Set an expectation for a short and simple conversation — it will help avoid the feeling that socializing is another item on your to-do list. And if you do end up talking, share something about yourself — maybe a photo of your pet or child doing something funny — to help build positive rapport. It may feel awkward at first, but reaching out to an acquaintance will create a spark of joy for both of you while you’re out of each other’s sight.

Why You Miss Those Casual Friends So Much,” by Gillian Sandstrom and Ashley Whillans

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